Selena Quintanilla, Mexican-American superstar, queen of Tejano music, died at the age of 23.
While most girls my age wanted to be just like Hannah Montana, I wanted to be Selena. It was my favorite movie as a girl. She made me believe that I could be anything I wanted to be. She made me feel closer to the latina part of myself that I didn't feel like I knew how to be. She inspired me.
By the age of 23, Selena had a Grammy, a successful fashion line, a fan base that adored her all over the world, a husband, and a future brighter than any other musician at the time.
I wonder if she would've known she was only going to have 23 years if she would've done anything differently?
I'm not sure and I'll never understand why her life ended the way it did. But what I do know is what I admire most about Selena is the way she pursued her purpose. She did exactly what she was created to do.
In 23 years I haven't accomplished majority of the things I thought I would by now. And I'm still not entirely sure what the pursuit of my purpose should look like. But I do know that God gave me this ability to see people and communicate, a blessing when I use it properly and a curse when I use it for harm.
I also know this past year I've been running. Not literally of course, I'm still me. I've been running towards the dream job. I've been running away from grief. I've been running away from parts of myself that I wanted to leave behind. And lately I've been running towards an illusion of happiness that I've found in Hawaii
Through God's favorite messenger (my dad) I've been dwelling on the story of Jonah and the whale. For Jonah, it was a boat that brought him to sea. For me, it's been a surfboard taking me into the ocean. But we were both instructed to bring people news. And we both ran away.
I can't run forever. I know that. So for year 23 I hope I end up in the belly of the whale, like Jonah did before he fulfilled his purpose. But instead of the whale vomiting me out
I think I'd rather just ride out on my surfboard.
"If I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me." -Psalm 139:9
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